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Couple

Relationship
Attachment
recovery

What is Relationship attachment?

There are four types of relationship attachment styles in adults according to John Bowlby, who is the creator of Attachment Theory. Read below to see where you might land in your romantic relationships.

People with a SECURE ATTACHMENT would show most of the following characteristics/behaviors in a romantic relationship:

  • Healthy self-esteem

  • Healthily self-reliant

  • Confident

  • Ability to seek comfort from partner

  • Comfortability in asking for help or care

  • Feeling trusting of their partner

  • Having healthy boundaries

  • Being able to be authentically vulnerable

  • Finding it easy to engage in open communication

People with an ANXIOUS INSECURE ATTACHMENT would show most of the following characteristics/behaviors in a romantic relationship:

  • Being overly dependent

  • Having a fear of abandonment

  • Finding it difficult to trust their partner

  • Having low self-worth or self-esteem

  • Having a constant need for closeness and intimacy

  • Being hypersensitive to their partner's actions and moods

  • Often requiring reassurance that they're loved

People with an AVOIDANT DISMISSIVE INSECURE ATTACHMENT would show most of the following characteristics/behaviors in a romantic relationship:

  • Being extremely independent of self-reliant

  • Having difficulty with criticism or disapproval

  • Finding it difficult to open up or show emotions

  • Struggling with emotional intimacy

  • Often minimizing their partner's needs or feelings

  • Often keeping secrets to maintain peace

People with an AVOIDANT FEARFUL INSEUCRE ATTACHMENT (also known as disorganized) would show most of the characteristics/behaviors in a romantic relationship:

  • Have poor emotion regulation

  • Seek extreme closeness or extreme distance with little to no in-between

  • Often very distrusting of partner's intentions

  • Have an extreme fear of abandonment

  • Are often chaotic, unpredictable or intense

  • Tend to be aggressive towards partner

I know it's exhausting to be in the same negative loop with your partner with, what seems like, no way out of the loop in sight.  

If you feel you have an insecure attachment style, I can help you find relief and healing so that you can show up in your relationship with more understanding, peace and presence.

Services

Areas of Expertise

I specialize in treating adult individuals aged 21-45 who:
  • Struggle in romantic relationships

  • Have experienced betrayal trauma

  • Have experienced familial dysfunction

I use techniques from Psychodynamic Psychotherapy, Internal Family Systems, Attachment-Based Psychotherapy and Brainspotting. Read about the different modalities by clicking here:

Contact

Contact Me

When you're ready to make the call/text or send the e-mail to me at Valiant Wings Therapy, I will be here. Please make sure all of your information is correct so you don't think I'm ignoring you! Also, to save us some time, here are the answers to the most asked questions. For insurances, I accept Cigna and United. Otherwise, 50 min sessions are $110 for individuals (I do not see couples). I see clients in Illinois solely via telehealth (phone or video) Mon-Wed, 1-6 PM. When requesting an appointment, please provide me a quick overview of what's going on in your life and which days/times work best for you. 

Tel: 618.402.4676
kristamcdonald@hushmail.com

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